Trying to put together this hyper-resume stuff for an exceptional alien visa and, it's like judgement day in my brain.

I'm so naturally compelled to undersell myself exactly because the process of trying to sell myself feels like catching my reflection in a hall of mirrors and all of them are unflattering.

I sound like a totally self obsessed narcissist.

I feel the need to announce how gross it feels to offset the ego-centrism of the process.

Orange boy joke/true story Show more

Friend: "I actually hate going to comic conventions"
Me: "Uhg, yeah, totally... Everyone all trying to be funny all the time"
Me: *is punched.

Mastodon feels like when you restart a sim game after a terrible first attempt, and this time you're going to min max your way to glory. Just try not to think about the mess you left behind.

Bad brain Show more

I can't sleep. Got one of those panic induced over thinking attacks. All brain energy diverted to thinking about one bit of code, as not to admit it's a plain old panic.

This better be worth it. The last few times have not impressed me.

if anybody is looking for a movie recommendation, i would highly recommend Tour De Pharmacy, an andy samberg mockumentary that features jeff goldblum wearing this outfit and nathan fielder's finest moment

Livejournalling Show more

Everything in games is easy to do at a basic level, and then ultra extreme nightmare difficulty as soon as you step out of the tutorial.

I am grateful for apparently having endless patience for this sort of thing, but terrified of running out of other people's.

I need to stop getting in the habit of getting obsessed with pet ideas. Especially ones that end up being impractical or illsuited. It's turning my job into a cycle of grieving.

Blues Show more

Working from freinds' today. This heckin'dog is amazing. Can get toys by name!

There's an uncomfortable realigning of expectations to be done about 'hitting it big'. And a need for lots of self awareness about personal privilege when saying /that/, in case you come off as tone deaf.

"Just do it as a hobby" is advice that would have really offended me, coming up, but it's on the tip of my tongue sometimes. Like I'm watching people dance near a cliff edge.

I want to be encouraging without feeding into delusions. I want to warn without pulling the ladder up behind me.

I've not been to gamescon. Pax West is the biggest conference I've been to.

The overwhelming feeling I get from games conferences is how many games there are. Some are more unique than others. But I am sure that each and every one of them gets some play time from someone.

It's crept up on me how much like music scene (or TV via Youtube) games have become. It's no longer about being famous for 15 minutes; you're famous to 15 people.

(this is sort of kieron gillen's joke but this is mastodon and he has no presence here so, just rubbing my hands together in glee, basically).

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Idle Mastodon is one server in the network